Parenting classes for all? Plans look as easy as one, two, three

by Helen Puttick© The Herald
Originally published: 29.12.2009

When Dr Linda de Caestecker became director of public health for NHS Greater Glasgow and Clyde, she had a vision: parenting courses for everyone with a young family.

Three years since she outlined the idea, she has announced details of the first mass parenting education programme in Scotland.

In the spring, seminars will be offered to everyone in Glasgow with a child in primary one or about to start school. It is a bold move – not without its critics – but Dr de Caestecker cites studies that show it has been a success elsewhere.

Glasgow parents will receive three classes in a package known as Triple P – the Positive Parenting Programme.

Triple P training was similarly offered to the entire population of the US state of South Carolina. Afterwards, researchers reported that for every 100,000 children under the age of eight, there were 688 fewer cases of child abuse per year and 240 fewer children taken into care.

However, it is not just families on the verge of breakdown who are expected to benefit from the service in Glasgow.

Dr de Caestecker says: “It is about reducing behaviour and conduct disorders in children, mild and severe. We know that if you improve that, the children are more likely to do well at school, have better attainment and better employment prospects. It also helps the relationship between parents and children and improves parents’ confidence.

“Parents feel better about themselves because they are managing their children and it improves their mental health.”

Three themes will be covered in the seminars, which will be held in schools. The first class is called the Power of Positive Parenting and starts by focusing on parents’ hopes and dreams for their children.

Raising Confident, Competent Children looks at how children can learn to cope with stressful events in life. Among the aims will be enabling children to express their feelings in an appropriate way and to deal with turbulent emotions.

The third class is called Raising Resilient Children, and guides parents on how to encourage their children to be considerate, to solve problems and to build good self-esteem and social skills.

Dr de Caestecker says the seminars acknowledge that managing children’s behaviour can be the tough side of parenting. Some of the Triple P messages chime with those repeated by television’s Supernanny, Jo Frost. Creating ground rules is part of the package, as well as giving clear calm instructions and imposing “time-out” for serious misbehaviour.

Praising good conduct is also considered key, and parents are encouraged to spend time with their children, to be affectionate and become involved with their children’s schools.

Maureen McKenna, director of education for Glasgow City Council, said parents tend to be involved in their child’s schooling at the P1 stage, but interest tails with age. Engaging with them at that first opportunity is therefore considered to be very important.

Laura Galbraith is a clinical psychologist and chief executive of charity Columba 1400, which offers leadership training to young people who have experienced tough times.

She said: “I think the seminars are a fantastic opportunity for parents to actually look at their parenting styles and understand their impact. Quite often parents do not quite appreciate just how important their work is to the development of their children.”

She said that equipping children with simple abilities, like being able to sit when they go to school, ready to learn, could make a significant difference to them later in life.

Dr de Caestecker and Ms McKenna agree that some of effects of the parenting classes will not be visible for years to come.

There will nevertheless be an evaluation of the 2010 courses before decisions are made on the future of the programme.

When appointed, Dr de Caestecker hoped parenting lessons would become as common as antenatal classes.

The first steps have been taken.

Top 10 tips from the Triple P approach

1. When your child wants to show you something, stop what you are doing and pay attention to your child. It is important to spend frequent, small amounts of time with your child doing things that you both enjoy.

2. Give your child lots of physical affection – children often like hugs, cuddles and holding hands.

3. Talk to your child about things he or she is interested in and share aspects of your day with your child.

4. Give your child lots of descriptive praise when they do something that you would like to see more of, for example: “Thank you for doing what I asked straight away.”

5. Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored, so provide lots of engaging indoor and outdoor activities for your child: play dough, colouring in, cardboard boxes, dress ups, cubby houses, etc.

6. Teach your child new skills by first showing the skill yourself, then giving your child opportunities to learn it. For example, speak politely to each other in the home. Then, prompt your child to speak politely (say “please” or “thank you”), and praise your child for their efforts.

7. Set clear limits on your child’s behaviour. Sit down and have a family discussion on the rules in the home. Let your child know what the consequences will be if they break the rules.

8. If your child misbehaves, stay calm and give them a clear instruction to stop misbehaving and tell them what you would like them to do instead (“Stop fighting; play nicely with each other.”) Praise your child if they stop. If they do not stop, follow through with an appropriate consequence.

9. Have realistic expectations. All children misbehave at times and it is inevitable that you will have some discipline hassles. Trying to be the perfect parent can set you up for frustration and disappointment.

10. Look after yourself. It is difficult to be a calm, relaxed parent if you are stressed, anxious, or depressed. Try to find time every week to let yourself unwind or do something that you enjoy.